i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Randomize
