Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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