uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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