You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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