what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
