She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
