Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
