Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Randomize
