Christians are straight up FREAKS
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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