Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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