It's Friday. Sex?
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize