It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
The best revenge is premature balding
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Randomize
