I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
