Swine flu. Run for my life!
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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