So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
