Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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