my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
