i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
