i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Randomize
