She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
