windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
