She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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