SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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