I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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