Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
