its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize