Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
