I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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