plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
