Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
