he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
