So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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