just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
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