Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
