some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
