he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Randomize
