Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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