Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Randomize
