i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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