It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize