Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
