Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
