Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
