I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Randomize
