Bisexual people are plain selfish.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
