You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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