Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Randomize
