Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize