Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
