I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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