Whoa Z and x make the same sound
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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